When I Know That All My Choices Have Created The Pain I Am In Now?
QUESTION: How do I learn to love myself through a dark time when everything in me says it is my fault, I am responsible for the choices I have made and I don’t feel so good right now. How do I find love in the ugliness?
ANSWER: We have all hurt others and used our power in a way that goes against the universal laws of loving creation. We were “learning” through karma, pain and difficulty and had a lower state of consciousness at the time. We simply did not know any better. Jesus’s quote of “Forgive them father, they know not what they do” is very relevant, because we truly did not know what we were doing. We were stuck in duality with a very low state of consciousness simply reacting from our own source of inner pain and spreading it to everyone we came into contact with. However, when we begin to awaken we begin to “SEE” our behavioral patterns. This is part of the spiritual eye opening, and the chakra system expanded. “For once we were blind but now we see”. This is a very positive sign of your soul’s ascension! You are starting to see your behavioral patterns and willing to accept responsibility for your life and the way you treat others. This is huge ~ give yourself a big hug for having the courage to face your self and the life you have created. As you face God/ddess, you face the self! During this time period it is very common to be filled with guilt. Guilt does have value, in that it teaches us “how not to be”.
Unfortunately, as we alchemicalize the soul we may go through a “dark night of the soul” where all our negativity begins to rise to the surface. This is a very uncomfortable time period, where the old negative ego begins to be transformed by the higher self. The ego feels like it is dying….it feels lost, confused, uncertain, doubtful and is full of pain from its negative creations. During this time period you must commit to your transformation through positive thinking, the spiritual practice of meditation, PRAYER, self forgiveness and self love ~ fully
allowing your self to surrender to your higher soul. Self love and forgiveness are imperative to your transformation, and it will require great EFFORT! Daily meditation will help you tap into the loving vibrations within your self, and also looking your self in the mirror and telling your self how much you love your self. Look in your EYES repeating “I Love You”, I Love You, I Love You.”