When we feel that something is missing, we start looking outside ourselves; we are looking for a partner to fill a void within ourselves; alcohol, overeating, may be working obsessively or may be go shopping as an escape or addicted to television.
Nothing wrong with these activities but none of them truly fulfill us.
We can feel unsatisfied, unfulfilled, a feeling that something is missing inside – a gap. And this gap we only can find inside ourselves.
Fulfillment, love and peace do not come from outside. The one thing that can fulfill the human heart is Unconditional Love. No one can fill that gap other than yourself. Only you can make yourself whole.
Many of us think that loving ourselves means buying a new car, new gifts for yourself then we are loving ourselves. We are always changing our surroundings but may be finally we have to realize that isn’t working.
We can have fame, money, beauty, but still remain an empty vessel and still won`t be complete because our hearts will be yearning for something more.
We all will realize at some point of time that “I will not find personal happiness, absolute fulfillment, liberation , joy and satisfaction in my personal life till I start to love myself unconditionally”.
We need to truly slow down and drop from our heads into the depth and wholeness of our being. Every time we say “I love you” to our own hearts, our inner barriers, imprisonment dissolves and we find permanent peace, joy, fulfillment that has always been there.
“How do you become unconditionally loving?”
When you embrace your perfection in this very moment. You accept that there is nothing wrong with you – that you are perfect exactly as you are.
We all have parts of ourselves that we judge, things we think we did wrong. But we must embrace them all if we want to experience self love.
Think of self-love as a muscle. Right now it’s weak and it feels like a struggle, but if you use it every day then you will develop with a massive muscle.
Some tips for self love:
It might feel stupid at first, but what`s really stupid is wandering around trying to get other people to fill that hole for you. You are the only one who can give it to yourself.
Shower yourself with love every day, pour total love and affection onto yourself.. The kind of love you’d shower on a beloved newborn baby.
This can be:
– Physical: hugging, stroking/massaging yourself lovingly
– Emotional: feeling a huge surge of love well up inside of you and sending it all over your body
– Mental: Speak to yourself, you can use affirmations: I love myself(attention to the heart), I am totally worthy of love, I value myself, etc…
Sometimes you`re going to feel like you are faking it. That’s OK, do it anyways, over and over again. It takes persistence, practice and consistency.
Author: Kate Cassidy